I really, really need to write this. Write something, anything. I have a feverish desperation to get out of this state I’m in. I need to break through, and out of my mental stupor. I feel trapped, really trapped. I feel there’s no way out, but there must be. I need to stop running away from this, hiding from the demon that will never come. Fear is a liar. I can know there’s nothing to fear, but fear lives on the inside, a colourless shade carrying an anti-torch, which rather than lighting the way, darkens my path. Not so much that this is the wrong way, go that way, but there is no way, no where to go. All is lost. The natural ally to Mister Fear, of course, is Lady Despair. I never see hear, only hear her whispers in the dark, when I am weak. Life stealers, purpose deniers.

I can feel myself, see myself tearing away at the walls in my mind. Occasionally, I see the light shining through, and see something on the other side. Is this my life without Mister Fear’s darkness? I need to break through to this other side.